Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Galactic Outfitters Sale! Zookatube: Shoulder-Mounted Beam Weapon

The zookatube is a new item for X-plorers RPG
From the Amalgamated Consumer Mercantile Exchange Company retail catalog, page 46:
Having problems with neighbors? Has the alien horde arrived on your doorstep to make you an offer you wish you could refuse? Now you can! Meet the R9, our latest shoulder-mounted beam weapon--or Zookatube! The zooka is designed primarily as an anti personnel or anti-small vehicle weapon.

The R9 was developed by top particle-beam specialist Dr. Gergo DeWittle, Central Space Command Weapons division. Here's Dr. DeWittle testing the prototype:
Dr. D's shoulder-scalding super blaster is now available publicly thanks to the open-arms patent code of SSA.2436--and we believe we've improved on his initial blueprint.

This zooka fires a super-concentrated beam of electrons and other charged particles to atomize your foes. The R9 even comes with a mounted Plusone Accu-site™ (scope) for increased accuracy to better target and terminate with extreme xenophobic prejudice! The R9's chromium finish and stylish casing design will ensure that you mean business when sending invaders to oblivion and your friends will envy the beautiful, polished shine. Satisfaction with your R9 is also guaranteed with a lifetime warranty.
STATS (updated)
Zookatubes use canisters of sparkly, ionized paste as a form of solid fuel from which to lase. The canisters provide enough fuel for four shots or one powerful blast all at once.   
Damage: Four single shots: 3d10; or one mega-blast: 5d10 or full 20 50 points damage within range of 10, no scope bonus to hit on mega-blast
Range: single shots 200, mega-blast 400
Bonuses: +1 to hit (with scope)
Cost: 800 credits, ammo canisters 50 credits ea.
Special conditions: The zooka must be held with both hands to fire and no other action may be taken during firing. It's recommended that users wear protective goggles when operating without a scope (most scopes provide protection for one eye when firing).
This item is provided in accordance with SSA.2436 guidelines regulating spacefaring settlement and defense. Plugging the R9 emitter with grenades, mounting to small craft, strapping the weapon to large mutant forearms, or any other failure to operate as instructed may lead to injury, vaporization, or permanent blindness and may void warranty. Amalgamated Consumer Mercantile Exchange Company is indemnified in such cases.

Other shoulder-mounted weapons


  1. Ha! There is NO WAY I'm letting my players see this at the stage we are at in our X-Plorers campaign. I can just think of one that would love to get his greasy mits on it.

    I'd definitely play up the temporary/permanent blindness risk to the user if I did end up using it too.

    Ps Don't you mean "...or one mega-blast: 5d10 or full 50 points damage within range of 10?"

  2. Andrew, they could always find/buy a used one that doesn't work so well! And on the mega-blast, I guess I was trimming it down for the modesty's sake, but you're right. Consider that fixed! ;)

  3. That's a good point.

    I was going to mention this in your post about recommended reading for Sci-Fi adventuring, but have you ever read a Frederik Pohl short story called "The Knights of Arthur"? It's essentially a (superb of course- it's FP!) post-apocalyptic story set in New York.

    Anyway, thing that stuck with me from it is the way that 2nd hand goods were handled- essentially ruined department stores are guarded by independently working "toughs" at different entrances who threaten that you need to come out the way you went in.

    Visitors then go and rummage around in the hope they could find something functioning useful before leaving, when the "tough" at the door haggles with you over what you've found. Of course the characters go out a different door because they think another doorman looks more gullible.

    Sorry for the tangent but I thought it seemed somewhat relevant given the frequently "material goods and products" nature of your posts here. I'll add a malfunctioning Zookatube to one of my equipment dumb tables (30% chance total blindness for 1d6 days with each use).

  4. Damned night-shift mania:

    "functioning useful" should have "functioning or useful"

    "dumb" should have been dump.

  5. Andrew, thanks for your suggestion, I'll have to check out Knights of Arthur. And if you have any notes after gameplay with the zooka, I'd be happy to receive them.

    Have fun and thanks again!

  6. No problem.

    One last question: No Exonauts e-mail?

  7. Andrew, thank you for reminding me as I just set this up--

    it's exonautsblog AT gmail DOT com

    I trust you can crack that code ;)